Even these yuppy dumbos will get to 'buy' a B.Tech, BCA, BMS, MBA, MMS, or PGDM from one of the surviving 5500 odd (as in 2021) Ghanta Institutes of Technology and Management or one of the Ugly Unprofessional Universities spread across India and owned by some Vidayak goon or a builder or a Mantriji or even a typist who once upon a time sat on a rickety chair under a tree in Durgapur.
The only admission criteria to courses is the visible bulge in the pocket of the father/ guardian accompanying these duffers.
While forking out a whopping amount spread over 2, 3 or 4 years, the parents will keep screaming to all and sundry that their wards were so good in studies that they secured their admissions through some Joint Entrance Exam or Management Aptitude Test. However, the parents will not reveal to others that the rank of their ward was a pathetic 1,19,924 out of the 1,20,217 who appeared for the 'competitive exam'. They will be careful not to utter that their ward's classroom remained 53.89% empty after the admission process got over only 9 days prior to the commencement of 1st semester exams because there were no takers for the seats that were open for grabs.
While in college the newgen dumbos would invariably flunk in few of the semester exams. However, by the end of their final semester, viz. 8th, 6th or 4th semester (as applicable) all will pass.
For 18 - 24 months before the end of their final semester exams, they will be groomed by some pot-bellied soft skills trainer who would come to class some 30 minutes late on certain days because he would often go to some pathological lab to 'taste' his urine!
The professionally 'qualified uneducated' dumbos will also get hired in 'tonnes' from each of the colleges pan-India by some much sought after Kaddu Consultancy Services Ltd, Baigan Technologies Ltd, Bigfart Infotech Ltd or a start-up named Drive to Kill.
The most frequently uttered word (non-existent in lexicons) in professional colleges/ universities by students, directors and faculties is 'campussing'.
If asked the names of FMCG/ FMCD companies which have shown interest in turning up for 'campussing' the face they make is like, 'who on earth joins a company to sell cookies or beauty soap or grease for automotive bearings out there in the heat in Sitamarhi or Jhunjhunu or Batlagundu?' The @$$es who can't differentiate between the a$$ and the elbow will give anyone a meaningless lecture on new age selling via artificial intelligence, social media and what not.
Give or take 2 - 3 years. The same guys who would be 25 - 27 yrs of age by then will buy their fancy bikes and cars with or without 5* NCAP ratings and ridicule others who supposedly move around in 'tin cans' because their own moms possibly reached hospital riding a Hummer to give birth to those pigs 🐷.
Within another 6 - 18 months they will post a status update on social media with their car upside down. Irrespective of whichever brand they managed to wreck, they will never fail to quip that thanks to the build quality of XYZ brand they came out with all limbs intact and still alive and far*ing to their heart's glory! They will say that they couldn't 'break' in time. If I point it out to the idiots that it's 'brake' and not 'break', they will quip in their Amrikan accent, 'what the fu**, are you there to deliver a lecture in English?'
Btw, I forgot to mention that other than a live-in relationship or sleeping with a colleague's spouse on the sly which is considered to be the in thing, in spite of being Hindus, they will keep posting anti-Hindu and anti-Indian/ anti-Indian/ anti-Modi rhetorics which are considered very fashionable ever since 2014 😡
Unfortunately, their soft skills trainer and college Directors knowingly or unknowingly forgot to tell them about a phrase '40 and nowhere to go'. More on that in some later post of mine.
Caution: The 2005 - 2006 pass out batch and the subsequent batches will have reality staring at them 2024 - 25 onwards! Nothing on earth can stop that and I personally earnestly want it to strike them in the harshest form!
Video courtesy: QRT
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* EducationAndCareerPundit
* IndianRoadie
* HowIndiaTravels
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